Showing posts with label air hostessess. Show all posts
Showing posts with label air hostessess. Show all posts

Come Fly with Me...on a Lockheed Constellation

One of the great album covers of all time

Agent Triple P has been enjoying Frank Sinatra’s 1957 album Come Fly with Me. Apart from the class of Mr Sinatra and the Billy May Orchestra we have been very taken with the wonderful cover for this production which comes from a time when air travel was still a glamorous adventure.




A grinning Sinatra indicates to a, no doubt, lovely young lady that she should hop on with him to the TWA Lockheed Constellation in the background. The blue sky, the shiny airliners and the waiting stewardess all promise a brightly coloured and supremely glamorous international fifties adventure.



However, all is not quite as happy and optimistic as it might appear. Beatles producer George Martin was in the studio with Sinatra when he was shown the artwork for the cover. Apparently, he was furious over the cover saying it looked like a TWA advertisement. Whatever he thought, the cover went out and the fact that Capitol records give an acknowledgement to TWA on the reverse of the cover does make you wonder if there wasn’t some early product placement going on.



The second issue faced by the record company was that the family of Rudyard Kipling objected to Sinatra’s performance of On the Road to Mandalay and, as a result, on all copies of the record issued in the British Empire the track was replaced by Chicago.



Although looking back at it now the Lockheed Constellation looks like the epitome of fifties travel, in fact, by this time it was already becoming obsolete. It was the last gasp of a way of flying that was to disappear with mass jet flight. The De Havilland Comet had already become the first jet airliner and the first production Boeing 707 flew the same year that Come Fly with Me came out. The first Douglas DC8 flew the following year in 1958. These intercontinental jet airliners killed the Constellation dead for anything other than local flights.


The original version of the Constellation

 

In 1937 Lockheed had been working on a four engine pressurised airliner to be called the Excalibur. However, this planned plane was cancelled when Trans World Airlines, encouraged by shareholder Howard Hughes, requested a plane that could carry forty passengers 3,500 miles, way beyond what the Excalibur could have managed. So Lockheed developed the Constellation instead and the first one flew in January 1943. During World War 2 they were used as long range troop transports. Post war they at last were able to fulfill their original purpose as airliners with the first one being delivered to TWA in October 1945. They launched their first regular transatlantic flight with it in 1946. A Lockheed Constellation still holds the record for the longest non-stop passenger flight as on TWA’s inaugural flight from London to San Francisco in October 1957 the plane stayed in the air for 23 hours and 19 minutes.


The Super Constellation

 

In 1951 a lengthened version, with capacity for 109 passenegers, first flew. It is instantly recognisable by its square windows as, indeed, on the cover of Come Fly with Me.


This is how air travel should be!

 

The plane’s elegant profile came from the fact that no two bulkheads were the same shape. Unfortunately, this made the plane expensive to make and less able to cope with pressure variations and all subsequent planes used the cheaper but less interesting tube shape. The last scheduled Constellation flew on a passenger route in 1967.  856 Constellations were built and 19 civilian and 8 military versions survive.




Although the Constellation would be instrumental in making flying much more attainable for ordinary people it was a very luxurious flying experience in its intercontinental days. Proper beds were made up for sleeping and passengers sat in large armchairs eating real food and drinking drinks served on silver trays.


Coffee, tea or me?


Of course, partly all this luxury was because people really needed to be induced to fly in the days when planes fell out the sky rather more than they do today. However, it was also because flights were expensive and rich people tend to be fussy about such things!


Come fly with me!

 

So today we can only dream of boarding a Constellation accompanied by a be-stockinged lovely wearing something like this.  We would have been able to look forward to being pampered by beautiful stewardesses.  In those days they had to be young, slim, well educated and single as this TWA recruitment advertisement from the fifties shows.




Sadly, in reality Triple P is off to Asia for two weeks; having to put up with seven flights, struggling through security, fighting for overhead locker space with people who totally ignore the on board bag limits, dealing with the idiots who always sit in your seat by mistake and sitting next to people tapping away at laptops or, even worse, people who never, ever stop talking. Never mind, at least on the Asian airlines the stewardesses are still young, attractive and helpful.

It’s nice to go trav’ling. Or it was.
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Ryanair Calendar 2009



The success of the 2008 Calendar saw Ryanair produce a second one for 2009. The 2008 calendar sold its entrire print run of 10,000 within a few days of its launch. It also raised £70,000 for the nominated charity, Angels Quest, which enabled them to build a new respite home for children in Dublin. They invited charities to apply to be the partner for the 2009 version.

January: Andrea, Miss Fuel Pump

Justify Full

The eventually selected charity for 2009 was the homeless charity, the Dublin Simon Community but despite the good intentions of the calendar it ran into trouble almost immediately after it was published.


February: Edita, Miss Lookout

The calendar was photographed in Spain and within days of publication in November 2008 the Institute for Women in Spain announced possible legal action and complaints to both the Irish and Spanish authorities.



March: Ulle, Miss Check-in

Killjoy spokeswoman María Jesús Ortiz claimed the images presented the women as 'sexual objects.' Justify FullEr, yes... They also claimed that the airline should have included men in the calendar as they made up a significant part of the employees of the industry.

April: Sheila, Miss Cockpit


Spanish consumer lobbying organisation FACUA, which had objected to the previous year's calendar as well, said that: "The company is attacking the dignity of women workers in general and especially of cabin crew members, by presenting stereotypical images of these professionals which they have spent years struggling against." Three of the Ryanair staff posing for the calendar were Spanish (for completeness sake we can reveal that they were Andrea (Miss January), Sheila (Miss April) and Silvia (Miss May)). Ryanair sent a free copy of the calendar to FACUA and a spokesman for the airline said "Our 2009 Calendar proves yet again that Spanish women are among the most outgoing, fun and sexy women in Europe. We are calling on FACUA to embrace this year’s calendar as it raises much needed funds for charity while at the same time showing off the best Spain and Ryanair has to offer passengers."



May: Silvia, Miss Engineer


Also throwing her weight into the ring against Ryanair was young Swedish politician Birgitta Ohlsson, who no doubt was pleased with all the publicity. Ryanair sent her a calendar too.

June: Luciana, Miss Control Tower

Ryanair launched the calendar in November and managed to persuade a couple of the girls to strip off in a cold and gloomy Dublin Airport.

Slovakian Ingrid (Miss Mechanic) from August poses at the calendar launch

English girl Charlotte (Miss Wild from September) and Ingrid pose in a chilly Dublin Airport


Charlotte and Ingrid with a Christmas gift suggestion at the calendar launch in November 2008

Unfortunately for Ryanair, the launch day co-incided with an incident at Rome when one of their planes landed heavily and skidded off the end of the runway after multiple bird strikes.



The wrong sort of birds cause problems for Ryanair


Five occupants of the plane, including two cabin crew were taken to hospital with minor injuries.

July: Magdalena, Miss Take-off


More controversy followed the launch when it was revealed that of the 700 Ryanair girls who applied to appear in the calendar only four of them were Irish. One, in fact, was chosen but had to pull out due to the famous "other commitments".


Nevertheless, Ryanair had to field criticisms that they discriminated against Irish girls. Top Irish model Rosanna Davidson entered the debate saying: "If I was organising it, I would have made sure that Irish women were involved because it's an Irish charity and Irish fundraising."

August: Ingrid, Miss Mechanic


However, all of this was but a storm in a styrofoam teacup compared to what was about to hit the turbo-fan.

Edita Schindlerova in uniform


In March 2009, The Sun revealed that Stanstead based Miss February, Edita Schindlerova was moolighting as a porn star under the name Edita Bente. The 5'2" girl from the Czech Republic seemed bored with the question when approached by the press, indicating that it was no big deal.


Edita in one of the less explicit pictures she has posed for

Now when the tabloids claim some minor celebrity is a "porn star" they usually mean that she has been photographed with her knickers off in one of the sleazier mens magazines. However, in 22 year old Edita's case they were actually correct as she appears (and still does) on several sites in pictures and video. In several sequences she is being entertained by several chaps who may well be passenger whom she inadvertantly dropped drinks on their laps and then got to know as she dried them up with a napkin. Or not.


It looks like one of the careless passengers has spilled something on Edita in return

Now nearly all of her pictures are far too naughty even for this site although we may put her on Venus Observations in the future! Actually they may be toonaughty for that too. We would have to create an even naughtier site just for her!

No end to Edita's career


Ryanair's response to all this extra publicity was only to be expected: “what people do before or after they work for us is their business” they said, with commendable open-mindedness. Not only didn't they sack Edita but signed her up the following year for the 2010 calendar (which we will look at in the future).

September: Stanka, Miss Wet and Charlotte, Miss Wild



So, all that remains is to look at the final few months of Ryanair's most controversial calendar and contemplate our examination of 2010's edition.


October: Daniela, Miss Safety

Oh, and if we had to pick a favourite it would probably be the lovely Ulle, from March.

November: Erika, Miss Hostess



December: Lorelana, Miss Runway
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Ryanair calendar 2008



Agent Triple P tries to avoid budget airlines if at all possible. However, some years ago we had to fly to Dublin and did so on Ryanair for the sum of £9.99 return. It was a most unpleasant experience with the real issue being the lack of space between seat rows.


Miss January, Julia


Ryanair have been voted worst airlines in the world by Tripadvisor, for the fourth year running, with a massive 41% of the vote. Earlier this year they were voted as one of the ten least ethical companies in the world.


Miss February, Jaroslava

A Which? survey last month put Ryanair second worst for travellers. Apart from uncomfortable seats and rude staff most complaints are about the extra charges they levy for virtually everything (they are planning to introduce a charge for using the toilet!).


Miss March, Karolina



Agent Triple P used to work for someone whose brother was a Ryanair pilot and she refused to fly with them. Something to do with maintenance intervals being somewhat further apart than on, say, British Airways.


Miss April, Nicola


Given this horrendous reputation it's perhaps not surprising that someone within Ryanair thought that maybe bringing out a charity calendar would engender some positive publicity for a change.

Miss May, Olga


Amazingly, they decided to go for a girlie calendar featuring some of their stewardesses. Even more amazingly 800 of their cabin crew applied for the 12 places.

Miss June, Magda


The stunt backfired when people questioned the image of having scantily clad girls posing to raise money for a children's charity . The press agreed of course, whilst, at the same time taking the opportunity to show as may pages as possible from the calendar.

Miss July, Edita


Having located all 12 pages of the Spanish Air Comet girls we feel that it is only fair to present all 12 of the Ryanair girls from their first calendar in 2008.


Miss August, Vera

Interestingly, a quick scan of their names shows that very few would seem to originate from the Emerald Isle. Not surprisingly, most have Eastern European names as do most models the world over, these days.

Miss September, Iris


This does start to explain one of the great mysteries of Triple P's teenage years: why were there no attractive women in the mid seventies? Today, films, magazines and the internet are stuffed with bikini wearing lovelies but in 1975, nothing.

Miss October, Joanna

The answer, of course, was that they were all behind the iron curtain building tractors, working on collective farms and taking drugs to postpone puberty so they could compete as gymnasts.


Miss November, Ingrid

From the nineteen eighties (to be fair, Penthouse spotted the potential of them even earlier) a flood of Eastern European lovelies has cascaded from the lands of Plodni Splodni into the west to completely dominate all froms of modelling from catwalk to porn.

Miss December, Dominika

Such must be the competition, that those who can't quite make it sign up as air hostesses, luckily for us. Unluckily for us none of them seem to join British Airways or Air Canada.


Misses September, May, November, February, June and January in uniform

Even more excitement would be generated by the frothing press with the publication of the 2009 calendar, but that must wait for another day.

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