Miss February: Brooklyn Decker


February already and this is Brooklyn Decker who is going to be lounging around my study all month. Pink!

Decided to walk to a meeting in Victoria yesterday, which was a good move as it turned out as there were Girls Aloud and the Sugababes launching Comic Relief near the London Eye. Scrumptious!
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Spanish Deliciousness


Met Agent DVD in the tapas bar for a quick lunch today. Haven't been there for a bit. A lovely trio of waitresses today: Spanish girl, Italian girl and new girl who looks very much like the Bulgarian examples below (my favourite).

Agent DVD was particularly taken by Spanish girl and we decided that it was because she was wearing a miniskirt and the others had trousers on. A very tight skirt which clung to her pert posterior. It got me thinking about Penelope Cruz and chorizo..

Had a very nice Argentinian Malbec for a bargain £14.00. This is because DVD is shortly off to Argentina and wants to get acclimatised!
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Miss Bulgaria

Well I just thought I would search Miss Bulgaria and we definitely are getting a pattern-appearance wise. This is Miss Bulgaria 2001, Tania Karabelova protesting about the Americans invading Iraq. Shplendid! Much better than that ugly chap who sits outside the Houses of Parliament all the time.

I found another Miss Bulgaria on the web as well and she certainly seems to fit the model too.
This is Miss Bulgaria 2004. Ivelina Petrova. A long way from the legendary shot-putters of the sixties and seventies!

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Back from Bulgaria

So, a good trip to Sofia, although I was late getting there due to everything connected with the flight going wrong. The flight back was the smoothest I had had for ages, though: no bumps at all!

There are two sorts of girl in Bulgaria: really ugly ones and really attractive ones. There doesn't seem to be much in between. There were some absolute babes at the seminar all very much along the lines of this creature: dark and obvious - my favourite.
We went to a great local restaurant Ya Fata and had enourmous plates of grilled meat and sausage all served by another gypsy-looking lovely. The women obviously don't eat the local food..
I didn't have time to see anything but at least I had a walk from one of the banks through the old town, which was very attractive. A shame it was raining all the time but at least it was warm..
Canada next.
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Destination: Sofia

So, off on my first trip of the year; to Sofia. I've been there once before, almost exactly three years ago, but for less than 24 hours. The only thing I remember was a very rough descent into the airport. Hope it's not like that again..
This is the rather interesting little church immediately behind the hotel which is the entirity of what I saw of the city. I suspect it will be the same again this time.
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British Airways Cabin Crew

They really are the most miserable bunch on the planet: grumpy, unhelpful and considerably less attractive than even the average citizen; which means BA must go out of their way to choose ugly people. I have seen one, just one, BA hostess who you could describe as beautiful and looking like you'd want a hostess to look like. Still better than Air Canada though. They seem to recruit the sort of women who built log cabins in the Rockies with their bare hands and ate their boots for dinner. Increasing use of dodgy males too on BA-the last one I saw had make-up and eyeliner! Yurch!
They also seem a lot older than most other airlines' cabin crew. This is probably because they have such a cushy number that they never want to leave. And now BA is doing something about people who throw sickies and they are all out on strike! They want to limit sickness to 13 days a year. 13 days! If any of my team took 13 days sick off then they'd get no pay rise. In my last job, in the Canadian office I was reponsible for, if you didn't take days off sick up to a maximum amount per quarter you got extra leave. Incentivise people not to be off sick!
Fortunately, given I am making 8 BA flights in the next month, I manage to miss all the strike days. No doubt all the flights either side will be messed up too, though.
Rather have this crew.. rubbery!
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Shilpa Shetty


She seems to be the woman of the moment. Agent Triple P is not interested in whether calling her "The Indian" is racist or not; only whether she is a babe.

Frankly given women like Padma Lakshmi and Aishwarya Rai then Shilpa starts to look rather average. I've been on missions to India several times and I have to say that some of the most beautiful women I have ever seen are from there. I thought the receptionists at the Taj Mahal Palace in Mumbai and some of the air hostesses on Jet Airlines were better looking.

So I'd give her a 7. Sorry Shilpa. Now what you need to deal with the likes of Jade and the other non-entities is an elephant polo mallet.
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"Ludivine"..


..was on the train again this morning. I decided to sit in a different carriage so I didn't stare at her. Actually I think she is prettier than the real Ludivine..

It's the evil temporary PA's birthday today. She's driving me mad but I bought her some chocolates in Fortnum's today, which seemed to calm her down for a couple of hours at least. No doubt she will be back to her usual insane self before long: picking fights with everyone else in the office, talking too much and bragging on about the Japanese Ambassador. Never mind S comes back in a couple of weeks: if she doesn't get kidnapped in Bogata, that is. Hooray! Counting the days.



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Not even a six..


Dinner with Agent DVD who was in fine form jovially taking on several national utilities who had dared cross his path and offering avuncular support to a good selection of the young babes who seem to exclusively populate his office.


Went to new Belgian Bakery Le Pain Quotidien which, given it features bucketloads of continetal bread is not ideal for a diabetic who has to watch his simple carb intake. Agent DVD rightly identified it as a "bit of a girlie place" but sadly the scenery was somewhat lacking. Cute but rather ditzy Chinese waitress was in complete contrast to the far more polished number in The Archduke who regaled me with details of the best places to eat in Shanghai.


Had a rather good red Australian organic wine whose name escapes me but finished in .eroo I think. Like kangeroo or walleroo or some such antipodean nonsense. Nice big glasses as well.


Had a "Tuscan platter" most of the components of which I was unable to identify and very few seemed particularly Tuscan. More bread. Don't think I will take my blood sugar reading tonight.


Had lunch with the lovely R, a Keble graduate and very good company. She has been landed in a difficult position re her job so hope I can help her out. Joined me for a later meeting with 4 of my favourite girlies. All 5 of them talking perfect sense in a way that the usual crumbly males that that organisation usually fields don't. Refreshing!


Not even a six on the station concourse on the way back though..
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A nice blonde..

..sat opposite me on the train today. She wasn't beautiful but had the sort of interesting face I like: strong nose, long neck, healthy complexion, small, rather narrow mouth but with pouty lips and rather grumpy demeanour. She was wearing trainers, black ski pants (a clue to her complexion?) and a cotton vest over which she had another white top. Distractingly, halfway through the journey she pulled the white overtop off (revealing a nice slice of tummy) to put another thicker top on. Then she fell asleep.

She reminded me of Ludivine Sagnier who is also not conventionally beautiful but has a fantastic figure. I bet she would look nice by a Swimming Pool!
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The problem with Kylie



I read in the newspaper today that Kylie Minogue has been staying in the "exclusive Malmaison hotel" in Manchester. Well I stayed there last year and didn't find it that exclusive. It tried far too hard to be trendy and just ended up as annoying and overly pleased with itself. The interior decor was horrific and reminded me of the art direction of The Persuaders. Like most of these trendy hotels they either employ too much lighting or not enough; the bar/restaurant was in perpetual gloom and the prices were very high. The only good thing about it was that it was near the station.


So. Kylie. I should really like her. Attractive pop poppet famous for prancing around in next to nothing on stage and all. The problem is I find her completely unsexy. I really struggled to get a good picture off the internet for this entry. It can't just be that most of her music is completely forgettable or that she affects that over the top cod American accent when singing (why do all non American singers sing in American accents-and even weirder, why does no-one ever mention it?). She has a famously attractive bottom so I should fancy her. Does the music put me off? No, because I think Jennifer Lopez is far sexier and her music is dreadful. She has quite a pretty face and can scrub up really well. I think the problem is that she has a very dull figure. Like many very short girls (and I have a fair bit of experience with the sub 5'2" brigade) she has rather stubby legs and her proportions just sort of look wrong. Some short girls are very curvy and so you can forgive them the short legs. So, sorry Kylie, you won't be appearing here again soon even if you are a very nice person. I had a colleague whose friend was a theatrical costumier and had worked with her and said she was lovely in exactly the same way that Geri Halliwell wasn't. Sadly agent Triple P does not care what your personality is like so you had better stick to your two-timing froggie boyfriend.
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My next mission..


..is to Bulgaria. I've always pronounced it Booll-gair-ee-yah but one of my colleagues said it's Bul (ryhmes with hull) garia-but then he did go to Cambridge so is probably clueless. I will ask the lovely T when I get there.

I'm staying at the Sheraton Hotel Balkan. I've stayed there before for one night and don't remember anything about it at all except my credit card was cloned about one week after getting back. A coincidence I'm sure.
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It's our Birthday!




Another one. Yipee. Horrible weather and a very unexciting day. Not really worth taking the day off for.

The best thing about it was today's wallpaper: the incandescently lovely Jessica Alba looking like she was moulded from hot toffee.

Oh, our birthday present looks good, though: a record turntable that can make your records into MP3 files. The record player is now installed and worked beautifully. This weekend I will deal with the software and try to do the techie bit.
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The Adventure Begins..


I have other blogs under another name but only here will I be able to waffle on about anything I like and post pictures of anything that takes my fancy.

One thing certainly took my fancy today. My fellow Agent, DVD, turned up on the train this evening with a very splendid colleague who we shall call Zoe. A fine looking young woman with dark hair, a strong nose and one of those Nigella Lawson type figures. Shplendid! Wonder where they were off to together?
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